LEO PORTER

Leo is a Creative Writing and Law student at QUT. He has been published in local zines such as Tundish Review, Veronica and PASTEL. He has performed at the Queensland Poetry Festival as part of the QUT Literary Salon.

All-Stars is Leo's third appearance in PASTEL.

Leo, you've enjoyed a super-sized appearance, having a total of five poems published between both Issues One and Three. At the time of Issue One's release, you were a popular contributor with readers; the romance and flavour of your style being a hit. Why do you think the vulnerability of your poetry resonated deeply with PASPals?

Vulnerability is something I think a lot of people understand, but the very nature of vulnerability makes it difficult to talk about. I would like to believe that my openness of, and my surrender to, such a daunting topic builds a relationship of confidence between the reader and myself.

What about communicating your feelings on the page is easier for you than doing so face-to-face?

I think, and I imagine many other writers think, that there is an interesting dichotomy between safety and exposure in the written word. You have time to articulate things in such a precise and accurate way with writing and the security of solitude in which to articulate them. At the same time, these emotions or thoughts are being broadcasted in a directionless outward spray which just doesn’t occur when talking to someone.

A sense of unworthiness runs through your Issue One submissions. In 'unliteracy', you question your worth to a relationship with the spark of inspiration, and in 'Preheat to 220', you question your value to the world's eye, settling instead for the admiration of your own. Since Issue One, how has your relationship with self-worth developed?

I think my sense of worth has always been derived very closely to others’ perception of me. This is one of the causes of a lot of the internal struggles I have because it is impossible to impress everyone. I strive to curate others’ mental image of me into one that I would be proud of because perhaps I don’t know how to do that internally.

You've played both the parts of hopeless and hapless romantic, the former consistently in your Issue Three contributions, and the latter particularly in Issue One's 'The Reason I Turned Away'. In writing about loves both longed for and lost, have you ever shared your writing with the subjects of the work? If not, would you?

I haven’t shared any of my work with the subjects of my work, but I have hoped that they would stumble across it. Its not necessarily the reason I write poems about people, but the possibility that they may come across it as some point is its own satisfaction. Perhaps this is due to my inability to confront my emotions and other people about my emotions, but I would certainly struggle to bare my emotions to someone in that way.

Your imagery in 'Pros and Cons: Us' takes on a particular mythological structure, in that you not only reference myth, but begin a pattern of establishing visual elements with a kind of ancient allusion - "your mind is a forbidden scroll"; "my mind is Hades"; "curl up in the architecture of your work"; "without smoke, there will be fire." What inspires your approach to simile and metaphor?

'Pros and Cons: Us' was more of an experimental piece for me. I just liked exploring the perceived differences between people and expressing them in a way that matches the place from where the perception came from. The mythological motifs were never intended as becoming the focus of the poem, it more rose to the fore after writing the poem. More generally though, I just try to watch life as it happens around me. Every so often I will see or hear something that reminds me of something deeper or more profound and I try to record them as much as I can.

'Mid-Class Croon' is a lighter piece in your canon, and is written for the "messy girl who writes dirty stories about trolleys". Could you tell PASPals a little more about her?

The messy girl is someone we know very well and is a very dear friend of mine (and, PASTEL Issue Two contributor) – Annabelle De Paola. The poem isn’t actually for her; we somewhat co-wrote this piece bonding over our mutual, inappropriate crush- affairs.

'That Pang' signals your All-Stars return, and is dripping in a lighter, summer haze that sets it apart from much of your PASPrevious work. From where (or, when) did this piece spring?

'That Pang' was a piece of reminiscence and nostalgia and I was trying to encapsulate that sensation the best I could. The starting point of the piece came from a moment in grade one, when I was at a birthday party and we were staring at each other making silly noises and laughing uncontrollably. Something sparked that memory in my mind for some reason and it was so lucid and such a beautiful memory to come across.

And, from 'That Pang', could you describe "the tang" for PASPals?

Nostalgia comes with a little prick that’s not quite sadness. That’s really what I was trying to express in my poem. The poem itself goes through the process I did when I was having that memory. The sweetness of the memory, its purity. Then going down there’s an intangible sensation of uneasiness. That pang or tang is all I could think of to describe it.

Unlike a lot of your poetry in previous PASTEL issues, 'That Pang' rests on less of a sombre note, opting instead for a sharper, sensory close. Does this change imply a change in tone, in your work? Where would you like to take your writing next?

I have made a conscious effort to try and write less sad poems. When I first started writing poetry my feelings were my muse and I always had fuel in terms of content. This became a bit of a habit and now I’m trying to become more open about why I write which ultimately affects what I write. My more recent poems, certainly not happy, but are less overtly sad and more contemplative I suppose. I would like to be able to write about anything. The weather or the news or a singular plant, but currently I am focused on mitigating the intense darkness from my writing.

To enjoy Leo's All-Stars contribution, pick up a copy of PASTEL Magazine All-Stars at pastelthemagazine.bigcartel.com